Tag Archives: young

Like the Creepy Old Lady That I Am

The other day I was doing something for work which required me to interact with a young gentleman of the  age of 19. I have to make it clear that it was work related, otherwise it might seem rather odd. Why would a 37 year old lady have to talk with a 19 year old boy unless it was her son?

I started talking with this guy who was actually not socially retarded, which is few and far between of the millennial generation, though he technically may be on the cusp of Generation Z. He is going into his Sophomore year at Roger Williams University. I have a very good friend that went there and still lives in the town, Bristol, RI. We were talking about Bristol and the school and what he may do for Graduate School as he is in the architecture program.

The entire time I’m talking to this kid, I’m looking at him, like shit, he is fine as fuck. He was tall, a little bit on the scrawny side, tan skin, light brown hair and gorgeous blue-green eyes. What a pervert? He could legit be my son if I was a total whore or as they call them now, a teen mom.  I know it’s wrong but if he was like, listen old lady, I want to fuck you, in a heartbeat, no thought necessary, I would be in.

At least I wasn’t a total slime, I could’ve asked him where he hangs out in Bristol. I’m sure he does fine with the young girls, but if given a chance I would turn him out. Good Bless, young, hot, courteous white boys.

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Bounce

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I was recently speaking with an intern. She is 20 years old and going into her senior year of college. She kept telling me I should quit my job because I’m better than the position I am in.

It made me stop and think. Present day Ruth would never just up and quit a job because she needs financial security and health care. If we were in a flashback mode, that version of Ruth would have quit this job so fucking fast. I would’ve been gone in a second and not given it a second thought.

What happened?

I sort of miss the level of I don’t give a fuck that I once had. I feel like I’ve been broken. I wish I could just leave like nothing.

I suppose with age you get smarter about how to handle things, but at least when I was young, it felt so good to just be done with a burden that I did not want to deal with.

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This Give Me Faith

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There is a guy at work who is in his early twenties. He is always telling me tales of his debauched weekends with his friends.

He spent the majority of his summer weekends on Martha’s Vineyard with his boys that live there all year long.

The coupe de grace was Labor Day Weekend which ended in a bullshit arrest and drunken motorbike hijinks.

I am so happy to hear the younger generation isn’t just about retarded protests over nonsense and pussy ass bitches.

These boys have restored my faith in the young. They are doing what they should be doing, getting lit and fucking bitches.

They should not be politicking and saying their feminists.

These young boys were doing dumb, drunken dude shit and it warmed my heart.

I don’t get the hatred of white boys, I actually have respect for these kids.

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Them Youngins

I was going for a stroll the other day and I received quite the compliment. A very hot young man gave this old lady the up-and-down check out with a smile. No. I’m not fibbing. He was in his work truck and I was moseying along.

Yes. He was hot. Stereotypically hot. How do I know? We were in a residential neighborhood and he was pulling up to a stop sign as I was about to cross the street so I got a good look. He was fine, so  much so that if he pulled over I would’ve blown him on the spot.

It made me laugh because I’m an old bitch but then I thought, well maybe he couldn’t really tell since I was wearing a chapeau, no, not my Make America Great Again red hat which is a real head-turner,  just some Nike hat. Then I realized, maybe he couldn’t see how old I was but he could definitely see the shape I was.

This was alarming. Why would this gorgeous guy be doing this? Perhaps as a joke? But why waist histime? Then it hit me, these fat women in the media have brainwashed men into thinking they are hot and it’s okay to be a fat woman when it is so not hot or okay.

Can somebody please put the kibosh on these crazy bitches and their propaganda?

They are ruining the youth of America.

Meanwhile, I would love to reconnect with this very confused, very, very good looking young man and help straighten him out. Don’t think I haven’t been keeping an eye out.

Maybe we were just two ships passing in the night.

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Unlawful

I was driving yesterday and I almost got into a serious accident. I am sure you are asking yourself,” Why? How could this happen?” Well, it was due to a pack of about fifteen, college co-eds jogging down the street in nothing more than sports bras and tight short shorts.

Are you kidding me? How is a person operating a vehicle supposed to concentrate under those conditions? Any human has to gawk at such a vision. It should be outlawed to let young, hot girls run around the streets half-naked. A display of this caliber is as detrimental to a motorist as black ice. Yes! Black ice, I say! You can’t be held accountable for what happens if your car hits black ice and you can’t be blamed for glaring at a gaggle of gorgeous girls and what develops after-the-fact. Theses physically fit specimen are just like black ice, you are not expecting it and it hits you out of nowhere causing you to lose control of your car.

I mean look at what happened to Kramer when Sue Ellen Mischke was strolling down the street in a bra! Accident! It ruined his golf swing for Pete’s sake!

I’m not one for implementing more laws and rules but there needs to be some sort of regulations against a troupe of tight bodied trollops. I know you are thinking, “Well don’t be such a pervert, ” I wish I could be less creepy but I can’t, it’s going against nature.

 

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