Tag Archives: fat

An Epidemic of Epic Proportions

I have been doing a bit of traveling as of late and I’ve noticed a straight up epidemic.

It is not that there are so many younger females that are grossly overweight. It is that these women have been bamboozled into the myth of body positivity no matter what size they are.

Since these gullible dames have bought into this bullshit, they have decided that it is perfectly okay for them to wear an outfit that should basically reserved for the beach or for streetwalkers.

They are all wearing extremely short, shorts and half shirts.

Some may call it a bold statement, but the reality is that it is gross.

That’s nice that you think you look great because of misinformation thrust upon you by other nutty females, but the majority of us don’t want to see this exposure.

The saddest part is I can see other people looking at them in sheer disgust. They must notice this. How do they not?

This is why fat shaming is a good thing. I’m fat, not as fat as these bitches, and I’m ashamed.

I understand the weight loss struggle, but these ladies clearly have no interest in bettering themselves.

I just don’t comprehend how they can leave the house and think, hey, I look good. It has to be mental illness.

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Let It All Go

 

See the source image I am obviously not getting in better shape so why not just let nature take its course?

I think with the new year, I have decided to just let myself go and get like crazy fat.

How fat?

Fat enough to be on a reality television show about my fatness. I would probably make better money than my current situation is giving me.

I want to get like so fat that I could be in fetish porn. So fat that people look at me and ask how a person can be so fat?

I would finally be allowed to wear my dream of velour sweat suits all the time.

Plus, once you go like that, you have to stay that way, otherwise there is a ton of extra skin that needs to get cut off, like an out of control circumcision.

Why not? Getting fat has helped so many undeserving females get famous. Amy Schumer, Lena Dunham, Lindy West.

I would be the least detestable of the lot.

I christen 2019, The Year of Fat.

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It’s Time

Image result for scale

It is very official, I need to lose some pounds.

I was at the gym, hat down low, ear buds in and away on an elliptical in the corner.

This guy comes out of his way to come talk to me. (I mean God bless him for having the guts to make the approach.)

And although Chris Rock has the joke, I said way before him, but I will credit him with it since nobody knows who I am.

To paraphrase, white girls don’t need a scale, they know they need to lose weight when a black guy starts hitting on them.

Did I mention the guy was black? Yes, the black guy, named Prince.

Now, most people probably think, maybe I’m being racist. I still stand by that it isn’t me so much as my pussy.

That being said, he is just not an attractive chap on any level.

I was shocked because I feel like I usually give off a wicked butch vibe and apparently he was not feeling it.

I suppose none of this is relevant and at the end of the day, I need to lose some weight, stat!

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Fat-tan

See the source image

Summer is getting close to over and I still remain in my Fat Elvis stage. However, I have a pretty nice tan. This made me realize fat is gross no matter what, but far less reprehensible when it is tan.

Why is this? Do you think it is better at hiding all the nooks and crannies and then a pale exterior? Is it that tans just make people in general look better?

It is odd that I have to expose my doughy flesh which is unappealing in order to obtain a far more presentable look.

Ah well, I will just enjoy my sun-kissed excess while disdaining my rotund nature.

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I Feel How He Looks

This is Josh Brolin’s brother, Jess Brolin in 2014.

Read the article.

This is how I feel. Fuck Josh Brolin, I don’t care if he was in The Goonies.

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