Tag Archives: corporate

Crossroads

I knew before I signed up for it that I would most likely not like working in a corporate environment. When I drove in for my first interview I thought gross and by the time I left I thought there was no way I could ever work at such a place. Well, I drank from the corporate well and here I am in the land of Corporate America. I suppose I should be happy that I am at a stable company with growth potential, but I find myself rather torn. Quite frankly, I detest the corporate culture mentality where groupthink is rewarded and individual ideas are frowned upon. However, I still need to make a living. This has brought me to the juncture of where do I go?

I find that being in this position is not only soul crushing, but makes me more miserable than normal. It is draining to drudge through the every day minutia of what seems to be like a communist regime. I know it sounds odd to say a pillar of capitalism invokes communist ideas, but it does. It is communal space, everybody works together, they feed you company “language” that needs to be regurgitated and you need to fall in line with company policy, initiatives and culture.

Perhaps it is my lineage of coming from a truly Communist regime, but all of this makes me want to rebel. I like free thought and discourse. I don’t want to fall in line just to be able to get a shot at a bigger cube or gasp, an actual office. These are not motivators for the likes of me.

I suppose now is the time to chose if I stay in this world of homogeny or break free.

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I’m Not Sitting Next to that Blob!

I recently learned that the replacement for my co-worker who passed away is close to being hired. Yes, that’s right, they decided to start interviewing ten days after she passed for a position that did not need to be filled promptly. The vultures were out in full force, the same ones who came to me with crocodile tears when they learned she had gone. I have no respect for any of these piggish, opportunistic swine.

That being said, the replacement would have to sit near me. On top of my not liking her to begin with and the added disdain for her participation in this job grab, she is just unaesthetically pleasing, She is like a big bowl of slop. I don’t want to be near that. She is a gargantuan beast. She uses up-speak like a cute twenty-something girl, but she’s a slab of pale doughy yuck.

I can’t possibly be expected to sit next to that. It’s totally going to ruin the property value.

To add insult to injury, she’s a super annoying, me-me-me hog.

I sense that this will not end well.

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Solipsism Anyone?

I have never worked in such a toxic environment. The most frightening part of these sociopaths is their complete egocentrism. They only care about how things will benefit them. Now, normally this may be mildly insane to deal with so many people having this horrible trait, but it is amplified in that the company culture is all about family and having one another’s back.

I am far too old to deal with this level of self-centeredness and evil bitchiness. I didn’t play this shit twenty years ago and I’m sure as heck not going to stand for it now. The me-me-me attitude in the entire corporation is beyond appalling. This is probably the most hostile and uncomfortable place I have ever worked.

I am still trying to wrap my head around how awful these people are. I worked in a bar for four years, trust me, I’ve encountered some crazy, sociopathic, selfish assholes, but at least I could drink there or tell those cunts to fuck off. I can’t do either in this situation. Though perhaps, that would make me far more happy.

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Draining

The meeting is a staple of Corporate America and it makes sense that it is. Where else do you gather a bunch of people who talk in circles, accomplish nothing and still pat themselves on the backs like huge strides were made?

I am the lucky lady who gets to attend yet another one of these stuck in the mud gatherings.

I wonder if anything will get resolved, oh wait, I know, it won’t.

I wouldn’t mind attending if there was some sort of productivity, but these are just a waste of time. I hate when other people waste my time. I can waste my own time, but when others do it, it drives me insane.

I wish myself luck in this venture today and hopefully I don’t completely freak out. I’ve been a bit on edge lately. This should make for an interesting mix.

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High School Land

I finally figured out why I can’t really get into this Corporate America culture and it is because it is a mirror image of high school. It’s been a minute since I’ve been in high school, but I remember my overall feeling of utter hatred for that time period. I was a teenager then, I am an old lady now, why on earth would this sort of set up translate better now then twenty years ago?

In high school you have to be respectful of the teachers and administrators or else you get in trouble. In corporate, you have to be respectful of your bosses and any other higher up muckety-mucks or else you get in trouble.

In high school if you cause any problems, display poor behavior or have an altercation with somebody you get written up or suspended. In corporate if you cause any problems, display poor behavior or have an altercation with somebody you get written up or suspended.

In high school there are cliques and levels of who you can and can’t talk to. In corporate there are cliques and levels of who you can and can’t talk to. (God forbid a maintenance person speak to some shitty manager from some department, career suicide.)

In high school the alleged “cool kids” thought that they ruled and that they were better than the rest. In corporate the alleged “cool kids” think they rule and are way better than the rest.

In high school I had to answer to people who were complete fools and I was far intellectually superior to them. (not saying much considering I’m not that bright.) In corporate I answer to people who are complete fools and my I am far intellectually superior to them.

I can’t take this anymore. I hated high school because of all these retarded rules and regulations. I hate eating shit when I have to bite my tongue. I’m at a crossroads. I’ve been doing “Fake Ruth” for the last few days and I’m exhausted. I don’t know how people do this? This is torture to my soul.

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