You Still Don’t Get It?

I’ve known somebody for one year and he still does not understand that when I bash him it is not to upset him, but rather a sign the I enjoy him. I am brutal to the people I’m friends with. If you’re not barbaric in slamming your friends then how do they know you like them?

I make my mean-spirited comments not out of animosity, but out of actual respect. Trust me, there is a major difference. People know the difference. If I hate you and I wish you’d get AIDS and if I like you and wish you’d get AIDS, well, these are two totally different contexts. Trust me, the people I can’t stand know I mean what I say.

I just don’t understand why this guy can’t just except that my horrible wishes are not real, but rather playful. He needs to learn to take a joke!

So when I say things, like I hope your daughter is born with a retarded cunt, I don’t actually mean it, unless I don’t like you, in which case I do. It’s not that hard to follow.

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