Very Brief Interviews With Very Hideous Women: Amy

 Q. What happened on the yacht last weekend?

Amy: Well, I don’t even really know, I mean it’s not like it was my fault. Long story short, Richard started to have chest pains and on our way back to the marina he died. It was like a huge heart attack or something. I mean, I was shocked because I figured the amount of Viagra he downs that it would be an impossibility for him to ever have a heart attack, wasn’t that originally created for heart conditions? It’s not like I’m happy he died, he was the ideal, like the Anna Nicole Smith fairy tale come to life. Richard was an eighty six year old billionaire. I had just met him like  a month before and we had been “dating.” At least I got out of ever having to have sex with him since he kicked the bucket before we took it to that level. I just can’t believe I wasted a month and no payout. What a waste of my time. Whatever, I’m sure there’s other yachts in the sea with older, richer Captains.

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